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Why Bloggers Suck

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So being in the blogger industry, you can’t help but scope out other blogs in your niche and see what they’re all about. Well, most of them in the affiliate marketing area suck, and here’s why.

Shoemoney A.K.A. Baldmoney

Shoemoney is marveled as one of the greatest MMO dudes/bloggers out there, and his blog has over 20,000 subscribers. Go to Shoemoney if you want to learn absolutely nothing about affiliate marketing but learn all about Jeremy’s top picks for the next UFC site. It’s also cool if you want to waste 2 minutes every Retarded T-Shirt Friday to look at Shoemoney’s ugly self wearing a t-shirt. The ultimate clan leader for all noobs, all hail Shoemoney.
 
John Chow A.K.A. John Chicken Chow Mein

Chow is another massive blogger and proclaimed “super affiliate”, and is another real winner if you want affiliate marketing tips. About 90% of his posts are crappy product/service reviews that are pretty much useless, and then another 8% are posts with pictures off all the egg fu young he’s eaten this past week. The remaining 2% are posts that won’t help you, making Chow’s blog virtually useless.
 
SuperAffiliate Mindset A.K.A. SuperAffiliate Look At Me I’m Considered a Sultan In India!

Furreal bra, nobody cares that $500 can buy you the royal suite in India, and truly nobody cares that Google sent you a mini fridge for Christmas because you were a good boy and spent $10k with them.

Go to SuperAffiliate Mindset if you want the mindset to do nothing but brag about the money you make. Wahoo you’re an affiliate marketer that has a little money, so are a lot of us but we don’t make it a point to tell everybody EVERYTHING we have and EXACTLY how much it costs. I suggest reading Amit’s blog if you really feel like just having the urge to punch somebody who is overly pompous.
 
Zac Johnson A.K.A Little Johnson

ZJ is the perfect example of somebody who made a little money back in the day and uses that as his platform into making all of his income via a blog. His big post was how he was a genius for making $800k profit on Myspace with Yahoo Publisher Network 3 years ago. It makes no sense to me how that qualifies him to write a “Super Affiliates Guide to PPC” when he openly admitted at Affiliate Summit earlier in the year that he really doesn’t do PPC. So basically the big secret is making some money with YPN back in the day, starting a blog, and then doing nothing but promote affiliate network referral links and make $5k a month from your blog.
 
NickyCakes A.K.A. My Name Is Super Gay?

The e-rivalry between Nicky and Uber is so great that it is sometimes said that they’re actually really good friends outside of their blogs. Not. Nicky and Uber should definitely just fistfight but it’d probably be hard because all of the Wickedfire sheeple that worship Nicky would revolt and come at Uber with pitchforks. Uber thinks that’s really funny and he really likes affiliate marketing. Uber also likes long walks on the beach and promoting green tea.

Notice how gay talking in the third person is? Welcome to the blog of NickyCakes, talking in the third person, bashing people, promoting Advaliant for their green tea offers and playing CoD4 seems to be Nicky’s life. My guess is that he’s on high dosages of medication and when he forgets to take them, he blogs.
 
UberAffiliate A.K.A. GooberAffiliate

Uber is your textbook “hasbeen” in the realm of affiliate marketing and affiliate marketing blogs. He goes with the classic “fake it til you make it” method of posting some 300k screenshots of his Azoogle account to gain subscribers, make a few good blog posts to keep them there, and then try and make his living by pitching GooberCamp to newbies. He doesn’t post as much anymore and has basically ran out of tips to post because he’s extremely outdated. “I’m totally unsubscribing” is the most common comment.
 
Click Consultants A.K.A. Click to be Scammed!

Click Consultants has a blog like every other one out there trying to teach affiliate marketing to newbies. He even charges for private consulting and a paid forum! Well it’s a shame he made a post with his “earnings” that was legitly proven to be fake. He never made any post in his defense and has openly admitted to another person I know of faking it. If you go through the blog, you’ll notice that every single post is common sense stuff, rendering you confused as to if he really knows anything about affiliate marketing in the first place?
 
Jonathan Volk A.K.A. Jokeathan Volk

Wow, another affiliate marketing blog! By the time you get to Volk, you just get completely bored. It’s information every single one of us has seen probably five thousand times, making us learn absolutely nothing from visiting his blog. He had his little earnings graph up but it looks like he took it down, I guess he finally came to his moral self and got tired of lying to everybody. I have nothing to say about Volk except ZZzzZZzzzzzzz…
 
Tyler Cruz A.K.A. Tyler Cruz to the Top Blogging Instead of AM!

It amazing me how many people subscribe, comment, and waste their time with blogs like these. At least the guy is honest with the fact that he doesn’t make squat with affiliate marketing, but it seems like the flood of newbies doesn’t really understand that. Cruz is one of the blogs that I never ever really have looked at, but looking over it for 5 minutes you can tell that he’s very similar to Zac Johnson, and will continue to make a few pennies repping MarketLeverage and blogging about crap that won’t make any of us any more money.

 

If you weren’t on here, congrats! Your blog is either so awful I’ve never even seen it, it wasn’t worth bashing, or I got too lazy and tired of writing to continue. Moral of the story, don’t waste your time with blogs people, just get out there and do it. Three cheers for linkbait!

Comments

  1. LOL

    I agree with John ChowMein & BaldMoney and a few others, giddy up!

  2. Jonathan Volk

    Lol. Now I am going to register Jokeathanvolk.com for my new blog. ;) j/k

    Thanks for the linkage!

    • Jay

      Too late! Beat you to it… lol just playing.

      Jay

    • Jay

      Too late… beat you to it lol… just playing!

      Jay

    • Richard Bonner

      The link doesn’t actually point to your site correctly :P

  3. Chris Charlton

    I totally agree with so much on this post.
    Most of these blogs have such little content on them. That’s not to say that these people don’t make money, but their blogs are worthless.
    I really don’t want to read yet another post about what John Chow had for dinner.

    I especially agree about GooberAffiliate :)

  4. Bryn Youngblut

    I don’t know how you forgot about Gary Conn. Tell everyone to unsubscribe to your blog and make 20 posts a day thereafter about random shit to get more clicks to the teet he sucks on aka Hostgator.

  5. badd

    and the story continues

  6. Ad Hustler

    Next time you do a post like this, TRY to at least be funny.

  7. disgruntled84

    i’m totally unsubscribing

    • Hustle Strategy

      you don’t like link bait, if you look at what he did here, you could actually learn something…

  8. ....

    lol. but why did you become so self destructive?
    just close your blog before you mess around with shit like this.
    if I was you I would delete this blog and say fuck off to all those ppl you loose your time with.

  9. uGuX SEO

    “Three cheers for linkbait!”

    I’d say you provided the linkage and linked to the Google-penalized John Chow. ;)

  10. Gyutae Park

    Soo.. are you admitting that your 300k screenshots are fakes?

    • SUP3RNOVA

      lol, they weren’t fakes and I’ve proved it to people ;).

  11. John Hasson

    Thanks for making me smile :)

  12. Navarroland

    True, GOYA and do something, not read some lame ass some stuff blogs, except for this one of course. Just deleted about 4 RSS feeds, I”M ALIVE!!

  13. Ricardo

    Funny you teamed up with Shoe to get known in the industry and even posted Johns great “Shit” post. Unlike most out there Nicky does post useful info though.

  14. Affiliate Queen

    Um…that was kinda mean.

  15. Mary

    I really miss this whole Super Affiliate sarcasm everyone seems to be putting on their blogs lately. But I have to agree, I dont read much on John Chow, but I subscribe to most of the rest, I want to keep up to date with whats going on.You run a good blog anyways and I enjoy the forum, someday I might even be able to post there, lol.

  16. Brad

    whoooo, lol iam gald my blog wasn’t up there.

    • Jay

      Why? The more hatas you get, the more successful you probably are… so on the flipside, dammit, I didn’t make that list lol.

      Jay

  17. Kiley

    I’m glad you put yourself on the list Paul, because if you didn’t, this post would put you right up there with Jeremy aka Mr. Linkbait. As it is, this post is UberLame and your entire blog is heading there as well.

    The AM industry is crazy to me and now I know why I do not go the these conferences. Everyone is damn two-faced, for instance Nickeycakes, he spent all the this energy sh!tting on Zac and the next thing you know they pose for a photo-op together.

    I don’t hate on anyone, get that money, but jeez this industry needs some real authentic people.

  18. Jay

    Okay, I thought that was pretty funny… and maybe a post because you’re running out of things to blog about? lol!

    Jay

  19. Dr_Ngo

    this was pretty funny

  20. nickycakes

    wow this looks familiar

    oh wait
    http://www.nickycakes.com/2007-top-10-worst-sites-for-making-money-online/

    • Pr0xyhub

      LOL yeah dude, he TOTALLY copied you.

      The Gaykes: 0 Uber: 10,000

    • Web Freak

      hehe

  21. louie

    don’t confuse the attention between uber and nickycakes as a rivalry, its more like a love affair!

    • oracle

      more like sexual tension.

  22. Frank

    Bald men are usually hot - but Shoemoney isnt - true dat, yo!

  23. stevewrightaz

    People are taking this seriously. Lol. If you read closely, you see uberaffiliate is in the sites. are you kidding people?

  24. ErickB - MarketLeverage

    LMAO!! :)

  25. Frank

    Best part was about Amit. His photos are all so gay.

  26. Yeah

    Thats hiliarious. Alot of that shit was true and Shoemoney has the most gayest blog ever. If you want to go to a good affiliate marketing blog check out http://www.JustinDupre.com or http://www.MadPPC.com actually some real content and they are hilarious. Great post

    • Brad

      Thanks for the props of MadPPC. Saw I was getting hits from this page so thought I’d drop by and say thanks.

    • KIley

      Justin should be shot for the font size he uses.

      • Brad

        ha ha ha

  27. Wes (MasterlessSamurai.com)

    well, i managed to avoid your list of blogs to bash. :) (for now at least) knowing how much crap is actually out there, it shouldn’t be too hard to fill the void and provide some real content that people can use to become better affiliates.

  28. marvin

    Just like everyone else, I’m totally unsubscribing.

  29. ThePost

    How to say the same thing a million different ways - ProBlogger

    How to examine - as though it’s ultra-critical - every facet of how to blog down to the optimum angle of keystrokes - ProBlogger

    How to promote a friend’s (subscription) course on how to become a successful blogger which repeats the same ad nauseum - ProBlogger

    Good post.

  30. Frank

    Who the hell is ProBlogger???

  31. Shannon Herod

    I would agree with you about the UberAffiliate. That blog totally sucks!

    Wait a minute, i mean…

  32. Kyle Irwin

    You should have mentioned the worthwhile AM blogs… errr, blog… http://www.cdfnetworks.com/

  33. Keith

    SuperAffiliate Mindset, Are you kidding me? - Amit offers solid advice, who cares if he brags a little every now and then

    • Mike

      Solid advice how to be gay?

    • scubaslick

      Amit offers what anyone who is serious about this business should already know. Of course its solid advice. So is “brush your teeth” and “don’t have sex with farm animals or monkeys.”

      That doesn’t make him “super” and it doesn’t make his blog worth the time it takes to read it unless you are a) not actually doing anything related to internet marketing so you can’t possibly have figured it out already or b) a farm animal.

  34. Diorex

    Great reasons not to blog at all.

    • ....

      ..except you have a useful blog diorex. How come you don’t blog daily instead of chow?

      • scubaslick

        Because people with something worthwhile to say typically don’t say things unless they have something worthwhile to say.

        Lesson #1) he who blogs daily hasn’t actually done anything worth blogging about today.

        Lesson #2) wait for a couple of weeks until I have something useful to say.

    • TF

      Umm, you should definitely keep blogging! Your’s is one of the FEW good ones.

  35. D

    Wow! I’m really learning a lot about affiliate marketing. First he shows us gay porn and now he’s bashing Bloggers which I can’t tell if he’s trying to be funny or not. Dude you are so weird!

  36. dave

    Great post, but are you just trying to burn bridges, gain linkbait or just piss some people who don’t want to be called out off?

  37. Dave

    You Suck! :P

  38. People You'll See In Hell

    When you consider how small and weak most bloggers are, he really has nothing to lose by doing this. It’s not like there’s going to be a rumble in the parking lot of the next affiliate summit.

  39. scubaslick

    Self Hate: Breakfast of Champions.

    So let me take a shot in the dark here.

    Two posts ago, a certain young lady told you to get bent because you’re a scumbag.

    You have a midnight revelation because you can’t sleep because you believe you’re a scumbag because she told you you are.

    You make two posts bashing what bought you your new house and puppy because you believe you are a scumbag.

    In a few weeks or months, you’ll come out of this woman induced coma and realize that you’re a retard if you try to make decisions for other people (and thereby refuse to promote certain items) and you’ll wish you hadn’t posted the next 5-10 posts you’ll undoubtedly make because she told you you’re a scumbag.

    Then you’ll realize that she doesn’t get a vote, turn your campaigns back on and drown your sorrows in sweet, stinky herb and funny slips of paper that smell like a wallet, all the while trying not to giggle uncontrollably as the next incredibly hot near-supermodel violates morality laws in 46 states in your boxers.

    You’re young Paul. Don’t take ANY of what you think is real right now to be permanent.

    This post did suck balls however; just gotta say it. Linkbait is fun unless you announce that it’s linkbait; which you did; which sucks balls.

    Wish you the best buddy,

    scuba

  40. Susan

    haha, pretty funny.

  41. Brian

    People that do… do. People that don’t…blog.

  42. Brian

    John Chicken Chow Mein…I’m still laughing about that one.

  43. gdubs

    your an enigma wrapped in a riddle uber

  44. Murali

    Paul is this your website http://www.uberarticles.com

    • Brian

      Why don’t you do a whois lookup and find out yourself?

  45. Gagan

    You fools! Paul is friends with all of them. He giving all the blogs a link back and a review. It looks like bashing but in essence he is boosting his ratings to get more subscribers and at the same time promoting these other blogs. This is a really clever marketing strategy. A win-win situation for all blogs.

    • stevewrightaz

      Yea, I cant believe most people commenting are buying this. At least, some I think are. They could be bs’ing too! Heh

    • Nmap

      Most of us know this, (you fool) It doesn´t change a word, by the contrary, it only shows what are those kids ready to do for a few back links.

  46. Toni

    this is fukcing hilarious :D
    and i agree with the most of the points.. the blogs are all “not good” except for a few useful posts

  47. Yebot

    The day I started making money online was the same day I stopped reading these ‘make money online’ blogs.

  48. BlogSavvy

    Link bait isn’t great when you announce it to everyone, but hey i’m sure it worked.

  49. dick bag

    your a D bag.

    • Web Freak

      Also to add, shoemoney might also be called Shoe Monkey

  50. Tip Jar

    Hilarious, all of the stereotyping that’s been going on in the industry in one post. From what I’ve seen, most of those are personal blogs as well as affiliate blogs and people always get pissed when someone posts something personal.

  51. Web Freak

    Shoemoney and JohnChow suck hard, others like zac and tyler are good!

  52. Nmap

    Funny. I’ve been making a live online since late 1997, I don´t even write a good english but I’m sure I’ve made more than most of all this bloggy crap together. I’ve never had a blog and will never have one. Most bloggers are just inmature kids like the owner of this one in search of some pathetic notoriety. Real winners spend their time working and they don´t need notoriety, family, friends, and their bank accounts are enough to fill their egos. Have you heard about REAL PROFIT, poor bloggies? this is something you can´t see in a check screenshot, fake or real..

  53. DamnSmiley

    hahahaha what a list…i expected nickycakes to talk and he did lol.

  54. affiliates miami

    Funny how I started thinking the same thing about you Paul . You are going back to your usual self of posting good shit though. Keep it up.

  55. Rob Deviant

    lmao. that was great!

    I rarely browse affiliate blogs anymore except this one because i just don’t see the point. Internet marketing is a simple science really. Hardest part is just getting started imo.

  56. dude Guy

    I like how John Chow is in your blogroll ;) (Or did he uh… pay you for that link? Hmm…)

  57. Web Freak

    Maybe ubers gonna be the most sucking blogger because of that comment post, it sucksssss

  58. Chris

    This is the best post on this blog!

  59. Syed Balkhi

    Good thing that I am not mentioned there lol … must be because I am unknown in the blogosphere lol…

  60. Affiliate Famous

    Operation link bait has officially commenced.

  61. Minnesota Attorney

    You raise some very good points. Some of these blogs are frustrating.

  62. SEO Tricks

    I love Shoe Money. His content is really good. Good post

  63. James

    I totally agree, SHoe Money is so useless, he should just change his blog to UFC, that’s all he talks about with his ugly ass bald fat dumpy flabby self!

    I learned squat from Shoemoney!

  64. Web Freak

    Uber should ban spammers like these, seriously

  65. Mike

    You are an idiot…. this is a trackback not spam

  66. Brad

    Hahaha! Think before you open your mouth - wow.

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